5 ways to keep your Comfort Zone from Smothering You

"Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work, so most people don't recognize them." ~ Ann Landers

My family and I were on vacation in California, and it was the time of year right before fall when the vacation crowds are gone and the pool is on the edge of being too cold to swim in and enjoy. The water felt great in the mid afternoon, but once the sun went down it started to feel borderline icy. You know that scared feeling and anticipation you get on the edge of a pool when your anticipating the water might be cold enough to take your breathe away and you are about to jump in?

Well, don't jump in dummy? Right? Easy fix. I agree, except I had an excited 4 year old and 2 year old that had been waiting to go swimming with their Dad all day. This stinks. So, I knew I was going in, and before I could count to "1" my 2 year old was in the pool, it took her breathe away and she started swimming and having a ball. And splash, just like that my 4 year old was in and begging for me. Do you remember your younger days when your comfort zone was big enough to handle a cold pool? I do, vaguely. But, somewhere along the line I only started swimming when it was a perfect 85 degrees. I got so used to the comfort of warm swimming water in AZ, my comfort zone had shrunk in so far that I probably would not even be able to swim, at all, in my old state of New York. It's just too cold.

A funny thing happens if we aren't paying attention, just like a frog will not jump out of a pot of hot water as long as the temperature raises gradually, we get stuck in a forever shrinking comfort zone. We all do it, it's part of being human; to seek the comfortable, to walk the path of least resistance.

It used to be easy to jump in cold water, meet strangers, interview for a new job, run a mile, get involved at great risk to yourself for a leadership role, ask your spouse out, tell your friends they mean the world to you, stand up for yourself or someone else, put yourself out there, take a financial risk, or any risk at all for that matter, and the list goes on.

When did you quit jumping into cold water? What has your shrinking comfort zone stolen from you? Playing with your kids, a chance at a better life, new friends, passion? Whatever it is, it's probably more than you are willing to admit.

Here are a few things you can do to expand the comfort zone:

1. Jump in and quit thinking. We "over think" everything as adults. And often without progress.

2. When all is said and done. Be the one who did more than was said. Quit talking about what you will do someday and start being the one who did it, and then talk.

3. Do one thing every day that pushes you off the edge. You know when your on the edge. So, everyday jump in once for a few minutes - meet the stranger, take a risk, do the unexpected, ask for the raise.

4. Play. You can always find ways to play and have a good time. The older we get, it seems the more intentional we have to be, but you can do it. Have fun with life, even when the environment you're in doesn't seem to be "play friendly."

5. Pick up a new hobby. Even if it doesn't stick, pick it up and look at it anyway. Cooking, art, outdoors, biking, running, games with friends, pogo sticks :), support a cause, volunteer, and you get the idea.

Expanding comfort zones nationally and encouraging you to jump in before you get too comfortable to enjoy life,

Jon Bohm

Top 10 Rules to Dressing Professionally

Realizing this is a giant rabbit hole, here are some absolutely basic and crucial things to understand when it comes to dressing professionally in a way that can help you move your life and career forward. Sorry ladies, I'm not qualified for you, but I will get a post for you in this area as well.

After seeing many leaders and executives fail at these 10 basic rules, here are some things to keep in mind next time you are shopping.

My top 10 list for guys:

1. Dress for the position you want, not the one you have. Poise and style go a long way towards promotion/sales/ influence. However you feel about that from a fairness standpoint, it's reality.

2. Never wear pleats or cuffs on your slacks. Sorry, to those who disagree. People argue this with me all the time, but pleats and cuffs have been out with everything else you left in 1993. I don't know why anybody is still selling these to unsuspecting guys.

3. Never wear a white undershirt that can be seen under a dress shirt or even a polo. Time to invest in some v-necks.

4. Your shoulder seam should be right at the top of your shoulder or at most a half inch from the top of your shoulder towards your hand. Oversized shirts make you look sloppy and unprofessional.

5. Wear fitted shirts whenever possible. A fitted shirt has been sewn to remove material from the back and sides of the shirt so that you don't end up with a bag of extra material around your belt or midsection. Fitted shirts will slim you down and broaden your shoulders. If you have extra weight you are carrying around your midsection you may need a little more room.

6. Sleeve length should hit the bottom of your wrist when your arms are hanging at your side. This allows a nice watch to peek out and keeps extra material from bunching and making you look sloppy.

7. Your belt, watch, and shoes all need to match. Brown shoes means a brown leather watch and brown belt. Black shoes mean a silver or black watch and black belt. Make sure shoes belt and watch all match stylistically as well. In other words, if you wear a formal pair of shoes, then wear a formal belt and "dress" watch with it.

8. Never, ever, ever, never, ever wear a tie with a short sleeve dress shirt. Dwight Shrute (see above). Enough said.

9. Shine your shoes. If you didn't learn this in the military, from a Dad or friend, go to a nice department store like Neiman Marcus and the shoe dept. can give you a tutorial. Or, click here.

10. Don't wear cuff links with a casual pair of slacks. The general rule is if you don't need to dry clean your slacks, don't wear cuff links with your shirt.

10.5 The bottom of your slacks need to rest barely on the top of your shoes with no more than an inch of material in the left in the length. Again, extra material = sloppy and unprofessional.

Bonus information:
There are many different styles of collars when it comes to dress shirts. Each one is appropriate at different times.

Never wear more than 3 colors at a time. Patterns need to be different and can be mixed and matched if done correctly. Generally a lighter, or more pastel, colored shirt should be worn with a tie that goes with it, but should not match exactly.

Best advice ever! Are you ready? If you are not the average sized guy. For example, taller than 6'4" or shorter than 5'5"- find a great tailor near your home. If he/she tries to put you in pleats- run away and find another tailor. Always wear clothes that fit. Being tall (I'm 6'5") is not an excuse to wear clothing that doesn't fit.

If you are wearing a tie, your pocket cloth should match the dominant color in the tie.

Hope that helps you move toward your goals and not away from them.

Enjoy Life and Shop well!

Jon Bohm

P.S. Every girl's crazy 'bout a sharped dressed man.